Happy Easter from Ed and Ronan.
Happy Easter
6
Category Archives: Random Stuff
What Will Make Me Read Your Blog.
Marilyn from ALotOfLoves wrote a great post called “What Will Make Me Read Your Blog Post” and it honestly made me stop and think about how I post. Sometimes it’s not good enough just to write whatever you want. I had never really put much thought into my posts before, but this opened my eyes.
Here were her bullet points on the blogs she chooses to read:
- Comment on my Blog: Before I read any other blogs, I read and comment on the blogs of those who commented on mine.
- Keep it Short: I do most of my blog reading in short bursts throughout the day crammed in between playing with my kids, calming tantrums and making lunch. I rarely have the patience to slog through a massive manifesto. My patience usually lasts about 500 words, longer than that and I tend to start skim-reading. An occasional lengthy post is fine (after all there are some topics that require length), but if every single post is a novel, I will usually find I don’t have the time.
- Photos are Nice: Including some pictures can really help add some interest. If I am browsing a new-to-me blog, I will often skim the pictures first. If the pictures catch my eye, I’ll stop and read the text. (Note: I’m breaking my own rule here by not posting any pictures. Rules are made to be broken…Except #4)
- Post Something Worth Reading: I’ve recently run across a few blogs where the blogger had a case of writer’s block. They literally posted a series of “I’ve got nothing to say” posts. I would rather that the blogger didn’t publish anything than post that. After the third “nothing to say” post, I deleted them from my reader. Writer’s block sucks and sometimes life isn’t fascinating. Not every post is going to be a winner, but if I’m going to spend my time reading a blog, I would like the writer to at least show they made an attempt at writing something interesting or useful.
- Please Use Paragraphs: I am not a writing expert. I know without a doubt that I make some errors when I write. I’m sure most people would agree that poor grammar, or misspelled words are irritating. They bug me too. But I have to say that the thing that bothers me the most when reading is a total lack of paragraphs. Nothing dulls my mind faster than looking at a vast expanse of text with no breaks in sight. I would rather someone use too many paragraphs than not enough so go ahead and hit that ‘Enter’ key.
There is some really great stuff in there! I mean it. I have a lot of trouble with #2. I tend to be wordy like crazy. But I now keep length in mind when writing, instead of just noticing how much I’ve written at the end. Paragraphs are also a BIG thing for me. If I come to read your blog, I want to be able to see a little bit of ‘white space’ between words. One big wall of text is hard to dive into, and more often than not, I wont bother. Also, I’m a big sucker for 3. I am just as guilty of scrolling through a whole series of blogs to see pictures, and they’ll keep me around faster than a great post.
I wanted to see if I had a few rules of my own to add. Here’s what I came up with:
- Have an “About Me” page. When I go to a blog for the first time, I will read the most recent post, and then click on the “About Me.” If I find myself interested in the author, and have any sort of connection, I will subscribe immediately. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt, but I want to know a bit about ya.
- Don’t OVERWHELM your front page with adds, buttons, links and other mishmash. I have clicked through to countless blogs because of an interesting title or a good recommendation, and not been able to get my brain past the massive onrush of information thrown at me. You may be the best writer in the world, but you’re drowning it in crap. My own blog may be a bit TOO simple, but I try to reflect what I like.
- Blog with some level of consistency. I don’t care if you only write once a month, or if you write every single day of the week. But writing every day for a month, and then nothing for several weeks causes me to wonder, “Who is this again?” when I come across your latest work in my reader.
I would really have to sit and focus to think of more than this. Honestly, I have a hard time with how many blogs I’ve subscribed to already, because I try to comment on everything that I read. The world of blogging is FAR more vast than I had ever imagined, but it’s also filled with a great number of incredible people. I like to spread the love. I want to read what you have to say, and I want you to do the same for me. It’s all good.
What makes you stick with a certain blogger? How do you decide who to keep reading?
And So.
Following up my 3 day marathon post of a story, I haven’t got much to say.
Ronan was a complete bear last night. He didn’t go to sleep easily or well, he was up at 10 and didn’t go back down until 2 am. Yes, I’m serious. I tried for almost 2 hours to put him to sleep. All of my usual tricks did nothing.
We are starting something new. I’m taking a page out of the books of a few of my friends. We’re doing a super strict schedule, which means meal times, nap times and wake times at the SAME time every day. We’re going to be more strict about bed time, and staying in bed. We’re going to get this under control. We have to, before I snap.
I have been depressed, and not getting anything done. No energy, no drive, no desire. I’m wasting my life away. I think most of it can be contributed to sleep deprivation and exhaustion. I can’t keep living like this, and it’s NOT better for Ronan than a happy, well rested mom would be.
Wish me luck.
Sweet Naps
I have done everything possible in the last hour to avoid writing a blog.
I don’t even know why. There is NOTHING coming to my mind about what I would like to write about today.
Then I realized that I could celebrate a breakthrough last night. Only I don’t want to jinx it. I’ll just put it succinctly… I got some sleep last night. And Ronan did too. That’s all I’m going to say about it for now.
Birthday party anxiety is ramping up. Way up. So far, I have 14 people RSVP’d and are coming to my tiny little house. My tiny, little, dirty house. I’m planning on working on that today – you know, since I’m all rested up.
What does any of this have to do with the title of my blog? I love it when Ronan is napping. I swear, God invented naps to preserve mothers’ sanity. I could genuflect over naps alone.
Goals for today?
- New baby gate at Target
- Kitchen tidied and cleaned.
- Floors swept/mopped.
- Living room tidied.
- Laundry DONE!
- Bonus goal: Clean master bathroom.
- Bonus goal: Clean and organize baby room.
I’ll admit, my expectations for today are a little unrealistic, but why not aim high? We’re getting the trip to Target out of the way early.
And right here, I’d like to do a little celebratory dance… just days from my son’s first birthday, we FINALLY have him paid off. *dance*
You Are Right, Momma.
We, as moms, have this need, this terribly desperate desire for the positive affirmation of our parenting choices.
It’s only natural. We want others to approve of what we are doing with our children. We want validation, support, compliments – anything to help us feel like we’re doing a good job. That feeling comes so rarely, and is so incredibly powerful when felt.
Because, lets face it, being a mom is really hard. It’s really hard to make all sorts of decisions without ever knowing what the final outcomes of your choices will be. It’s incredibly difficult to decide on a path that you would like to take despite all of the opposing arguments you hear around you. You will ALWAYS hear opposing arguments. It doesn’t matter what choice you make.
The thing is, every single choice that you make is the right one. And at the end of the day, the only person you have to prove that to is yourself. If you can look at what you’ve done with your child, how you’ve raised him or her, the choices that you’ve made and the actions that you’ve taken without feeling guilt or remorse, you have done well. It doesn’t matter what your next door neighbor did, or what your mother-in-law thinks you should be doing. It shouldn’t bother you when someone criticizes something you have chosen to do, because they do not have to live with the outcome.
And here’s the real kicker of it all. We ALL want to tell other moms what they should be doing, because if someone does the same things we did, it somehow means – in a round-about way – that it was the RIGHT thing to do. If it works for more than just me, it must be right, right? So sure, I’ll look at what you’re doing wrong and say, “Oh, we did this. You should try it.” Fully expecting it to work for you as well as it worked for us. But your kid isn’t my kid. And your style isn’t my style. And JUST because it worked for us does NOT mean it will work for you. When it doesn’t work for you, you’ll think less of my parenting skills, and be less likely to look to me for advice again. Then, in the future, when someone asks YOU for advice, you’ll tell them what YOU did, fully expecting it to work, and feeling bad when it doesn’t. Here’s a secret I’m going to let you in on: it probably wont work for someone else.
I have been in situations where I’m willing to listen to ANY advice that is given, hoping to finally fall upon the one little piece that works. And when someone asks me for advice, I give it. Every time it doesn’t work, it makes me seriously hesitate to give out any other advice. I hate that feeling, like you’ve let someone down. But I always tell myself that just because it didn’t work for them doesn’t mean it wasn’t the right thing for us to do.
So, here’s a question for you. If you give formula, and your sister gives breastmilk, and your cousin gave whole milk too early, and your neice-in-law never gave cereal, and your mom says she would never have let the baby get that old without putting cereal in her bottle, and your aunt on your dad’s side says that you’re spoiling your child because you hold her while you feed her, and your co-worker only gave a vegan diet… which one is right?
That’s it.
They all are.
YOU are right. And you need to STOP listening to what they’re telling you is wrong, but you also need to STOP looking at other people and thinking their way is inferior to yours. Because it’s not. It’s right up there beside yours on the “it’s right for us” table. Your right to do exactly what you want goes hand in hand being mature enough to let others do what they would.
I am proud to baby-wear, co-sleep, breast feed, glad that I never gave cereal or purees, don’t use strollers, and can’t let my child cry it out. That is what is right for ME. I hate it when someone tells me something I’m doing wrong. But I realize that they just want me to do it their way because that was RIGHT to them. I think the hardest part of being a mom is realizing that your way isn’t the universal way, and that is okay.
Oh, and to all my formula feeding, stroller loving, cereal-in-the-bottle, sleep training mommas – I love you for what you do. Be proud of your choices and decisions. Because.
You.
Are.
Right.
Resolution and Cleanliness.
Hmm.
Yesterday was plain awful. (You can say that again.) Yesterday was plain awful!
Ten points to whomever can figure out where that is from.
Things are working out, and I’m sure they will be fine. They always seem to be. But changes are going to be made on multiple fronts. I’d love to get into more detail, but it’s not my problem, so it’s not my place to say. Since my blog is no longer exactly ‘private’, I can’t really go into things that I otherwise might have.
Today, I got my carpets cleaned. The fellow was a good ol’ boy, incredibly polite and proper, but he did a great job. He called me “Miss Mandy” the whole time he was here. And he prefaced every single statement he made with, “Now, I’m gonna be honest with you Miss Mandy, now…” Evidently this guy never lies.
He talked about the carpet damage we have at the edges of our cream colored carpet where it’s all turning black. He said it was soot from our air ventilation system. We had asked the heating and air people when they came out if they knew what was causing it, and they told us that we “burn too many candles.” When I told the carpet dude this, he laughed so hard he had to sit down for a minute.
“Now, I’m gonna be honest with you Miss Mandy, now there is NO possible way candles could do that much damage to your carpet. No ma’am. There’s no way. Now, I’m gonna be honest with you, now you just need to get those vents cleaned out. That will fix your problem right there, Miss Mandy.”
He was almost too country to be real. But he did a great job. The carpet looks excellent. Ronan and I are hanging out in the loft for the next 2-3 hours while it dries… and then we’re going to go down and play! On our awesome, newly cleaned carpet.
If you ever want to know who you should use for your carpet cleaning, I highly recommend ChemDry Express. They came highly recommended to me as well. The price was reasonable, the job was done in about an hour, and the quality of the work was excellent!
I haven’t posted any pictures in a while. I’ll get on that later today. I’ve got a couple sweet ones. Play date later today with my favorite ladies!
No Post Today.
I’m dealing with too much emotional shit today to write a blog.
Normally, I would write about the shit and that would help. But it’s a sensitive subject, and I’m unable to figure out how to deal with it right now. I can’t deal with it right now.
Come back tomorrow for our regularly scheduled programming. Or, enjoy a video of my son.
Thanks.
She Looks Like a Mom.
I have to be honest with you, I’m not going to lie. There are times when looking much younger than my age is rather frustrating.
When a patient walks into the ultrasound room and asks me, “Are you sure you’re old enough to be doing this?”
Seriously, if I wasn’t old enough to be here, I wouldn’t be here. I’m pretty SURE.
When going out to a bar or club, and getting everyone there carded, because I’m the one that looks under-age. That’s inconvenient.
When I go clothes shopping, and I can’t find anything I like in my ‘age group’, so I check out the kids section. That’s mostly just annoying.
But when I take my son to the mall, and I want to let him play around in the play place, it is probably the worst of all. I’ve been trying, because everyone tells me if I go out and meet other parents, other moms, I can make a network of friends with whom I have something in common.
There’s one small problem with that.
All of the moms at the mall see me with my young son and immediately turn their backs, turn up their noses, turn off their interest. No one smiles at us, no one asks us any questions. No “How old is your baby?” or, “How cute… is he walking yet?” They summarily ignore us, and it took me a while to figure out why.
I don’t look old enough to be his mother. I don’t LOOK old enough. No one bothers to find out how old I actually am. I look like a teenage mom that had her baby just out of high school. Or better yet, I look like the babysitter, lucky enough to get a gorgeous, well-behaved boy to take out with me! Who wants to network with the babysitter?
I walk up to, and chat with just about everyone that is there. Make comments about having fun, and what an awesome place this is. How much Ronan loves it, and how it tires him out so well. I get a polite smile, a nod of assent, and then a cold shoulder.
I think I need to get a tee-shirt made that says, “Yes I’m old enough to be his mom. YES, I’m REALLY his MOM!”
Not that it would help.
Brock told me to go to the nearest high school and make friends with the ‘easy’ girls. “They’ll be moms soon enough.” Ha. Ha. Ha.
Now, all that being said. Just because I look young doesn’t mean I’m a bad mom, nor does it mean that I’m not worthy of getting to know. Some of my VERY best friends are older moms, and they like me just fine. It makes me wonder if girls my age that have kids go through the same thing, or if it’s just some peculiar Charlotte breed of snobbery. I guess time will tell.
You Might Want To Ignore This Post.
I have things to blog about.
I’m just so freaking out of it after a bad Monday sleep, it’s hard to get going.
11:30, and I still haven’t showered. I’m lucky that Ronan and I have both eaten. We’re still both in our pajamas. We’ve been watching Finding Nemo.
Actually, this isn’t such a bad day.
I want to take Ronan to the mall after his next nap and let him run around the play place. “Run” is a subjective term, as he really crawls, or holds on to my fingers and toddles. It’s super duper cute, and tires him out faster than you would believe.
I also need to make dinner, but that involves cleaning things. Oh, how I hate cleaning things.
I think it’s time for our nap. I’ll write more later.
Edit:
I decided to make this blog better by adding a video of Ronan play Fetch with himself. Try not to giggle.
Monday Monday.
Mondays are, without a doubt, the hardest day of the week for me.
Getting home at 7:30 am or so, and then going to bed for a measly 4 hours of sleep after working all night… then trying to get up and be functional so that, come bed time, I’ll actually be able to fall asleep Monday night.
It could always be worse. I could be unemployed, have no money, and not be able to provide for our family. It helps to put things in perspective every now and again. Although, sometimes the swimming pool full of chocolate pudding looks mighty tempting.
I have so many random thoughts running through my mind. I applied for a position back at Maternal & Fetal medicine a few weeks ago, and found out today that I didn’t get the job. It’s sort of mixed emotions, really. I’m terribly sad, because I loved working there so dearly, and it hurts me that they didn’t want me back. Maybe I shouldn’t take it personally, but I’m a fairly sensitive person and I hate feeling like there was something about me they didn’t like enough to decide to pass me over. I used to work there, right? So I don’t have to be trained in, I could just hit the ground running, and go! I already had daycare lined up and everything. But on that other hand, it would mean giving up all of my precious time with a little boy that is growing up too fast already. Staying on the weekend shift means not having to miss anything. A huge part of me is hurt and sad that I wasn’t given the job, but a whole other part is relieved that I don’t have to change anything about my life right now.
Brock is going to tell me that it’s a bad idea to blog that I had applied for another job, because I don’t know who reads this, and I don’t know if people from my work might find out. I just want to put it out there that I’m not actively LOOKING for another job, and I’m really quite happy working where I am right now. It’s just that the opportunity came up to return to a job that I absolutely LOVED with people that I adored, and I went for it. I’m completely content remaining right where I am for the time being, and don’t see that changing any time soon. So don’t sweat it.
Ugh. Yeah, it sucks. Why would they tell me when I left that I was more than welcome back at any time in the future if I wanted to return and they were hiring? Why would they tell me to go ahead and apply when the position opened? And wouldn’t it be nice to have enough consideration to let me know WHY I didn’t get the job?
I have to stop being so sensitive. I liked working there so much, and it makes me feel sick to think that they didn’t really like having me there.
Move on, Mandy.
There will be other opportunities, and other jobs that I absolutely love. Who knows, maybe I’m not meant to work there again? Maybe there’s a big old plan in mind that doesn’t include working a full time job? I’ll just keep thinking like that. Cause it’s a lot more fun, and a lot less sucky.