I just realized that on the 15th, my little blog has been live for one whole month.

I’ve had a lot of fun with it so far.  I hope that I can keep it up.  I find myself thinking about my daily adventures and how they can translate into a good post.  So far, today, I’ve got nothing.  I’m being entirely domestic.  Grocery shopping is already done, fridge is cleaned out, baby is down for a nap, diapers are in the wash, and baby clothes are almost done in the dryer.  Maybe need to wash some mommy-daddy clothes today too.  I think I’m out of underwear.

I’m sitting in the floor, eating a cup of oatmeal because it’s the first thing I’ve had to eat today.  I got up and rushed to Game Stop to pick up a ‘new release’ game for Brock, and didn’t have time to eat.  Then, when I stopped at Starbucks to get a Vivanno Strawberry Banana smoothie, they didn’t have any bananas.  I asked the lady if she could just make me a strawberry smoothie, and I was duly informed that it wouldn’t be any good, because the consistency wouldn’t be right; it would just be all foamy.  So I said ‘thanks, have a nice day’ and left.  But what I was really thinking is Damn Starbucks always lets me down when I need it the most.

The baby dishes are sitting in the sink waiting to be washed.  My kitchen floor needs to be mopped, and the living room needs to be vacuumed.  Ooops, there goes the dryer.  Better get back to work.

Speaking of work… I have to work a 12 tomorrow.  Such is the life of a stay-at-home-full-time-working mom.

Upon deciding that I would create a ‘real’ blog, I also decided that it was important for me to commit to writing every single day.  That is one of the few things that has been missing in my previous endeavors as a blogger.  And then, I always get to the point where I’ve had a horrible day, and I don’t want to write, and I have to do it anyways.

Could you hear the whining tone?

But I’m going to write anyways!  Since today has actually been a great day, despite getting in a huge fight with my husband over absolutely nothing. Ronan had his second chiropractor appointment, and it was amazing.  She adjusted his neck again, and he just lay there and let her do it!  It was as though he knew that it was going to make him feel better.  We came home and immediately had a 2 hour nap.  One of the best one’s ever.  And I got SO much done!

I have some ideas for this blog.  Some quite stolen from other blogs, and some semi-original ideas.  I want to write letters to Ronan.  I WILL keep them separately, but put them up here.  I also want to post old blogs from my Xanga – I think I’ve written some amazing things, and they shouldn’t just die in the Xanga archives.  I’ll try to intersperse them with regular blogs.  I also want to post pictures that I’ve taken, as you may have seen.  Most of all, I would like for my writing to improve, and the only way for that to happen is just to simply write and write and write.

Have I ever said before that I love Sandra Bullock?  Well, I do.

Yeah, it really is just that.  The real question is, who knows how long it will continue to be in progress for?

The hardest part about a venture like this is that I spend a few hours every day working on this website, and only a few short minutes of that is something actually enjoyable.  Like writing.  It’s taking a lot longer than I really thought it would to get everything figured out.  Right now, I’m just using a pre-made layout, and Brock really wants me to have my own designed and worked up.  That seems like a whole lot of effort to me.  I’d love to try to make this as easy as possible.

The Chiropractor thing?  Seems to totally have been a success.  Ronan has slept better in the last 3 nights than he has in months.  That doesn’t mean that he’s been perfect by any stretch of the imagination – but there has been improvement.  It really feels like, no matter what, as long as things might be getting better, I can deal with it.  It was that downward spiral that seemed to continue to slowly degrade into nothingness that was completely soul crushing.

Speaking of soul crushing, work is so difficult to handle.  Brock and I had this huge discussion the other day about how overwhelming it seemed to think about having another baby when our house is in a constant state of turmoil.  I pointed out to him rather forcefully that I could be a mom, work full time, and clean the house – but he can ONLY have two of the three at any given time.  So if he wants to have a clean house, and keep his son, the job needs to go.  And if he wants me to keep working (and keep his son!) we need to hire someone to help us clean.  Really, giving away the kid isn’t so much of an option – although I’ve had offers!

I’m stressed out to the max, and I think it’s making me lose my milk.  That stresses me out more.  But things shall get better, I am sure.  Because that’s what they do.  They get worse and worse until I think we can’t take it any more… and then they get better.  I might just repeat that to myself a few times, until I actually believe it.

I have created my very own blog.
It is still in its infancy.  I get to sit here, on the floor in my living room with my laptop on the couch seat, and work on my project while my son is napping.  My son, by the way, is Ronan.  The worlds most wonderful baby, that is actually quite horrible sometimes.  Right now, I need to get my layout, design ideas and everything together.  I want to get some advertisements on my page.  Ugh.  (I know, right?)  But the idea is that perhaps, someday, my writing and my passions will allow me to be a stay at home mom.

I love to read blogs.  Other people love to read blogs.  Why not mine?

I took Ronan to the chiropractor today.  My husband, Brock, thinks chiropract-y(?) is a racket.  We’ll see.  If he sleep better tonight, then maybe it will have been worth it.

On with the blog ideas.  I’m going to post pictures regularly, because I LOVE to photograph my son, and just about everything else in my life.  I’d like to touch on topics that are serious, as well as blabber on inanely about my day.  We’ll see how it turns out in the end.