Tag Archives: Sleep Stuff

Thud. Scream.

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Last night, we all slept great.

The night before, however, is a different story. I woke up around 4am and was laying in bed trying to fall back asleep. I heard Ronan stirring in bed, not fully awake but not sleeping either. I turned on the video monitor so I could see what he was up to.

I watched as he tossed and turned. He constantly rearranged the blankets and tried to get comfortable. He sat up and laid down, then sat up again. He drank some water.

Then he did the strangest thing. He stood up and pulled the blankets all the way over his head, like a ghost. And then he just stood there. For minutes. I was entirely perplexed and couldn’t figure out if this was awake behavior or sleeping. I watched as he stumbled forward and caught himself on the side of the crib. I thought to myself, “that was close. Could have been bad!”

He stood there for another minute, and then he started jumping.

JUMPING.

I watched as if in slow motion as he pitched forward and had no idea where he was falling. I watched as he failed to catch himself a second time. I watched as his head smashed into the railing with a resounding thud.

I was up before the first scream came out. I snapped off the monitor (Brock was still sleeping) and ran out of the room. I heard the first painful cry as I was just steps away from the door and knew… the longer the break between the injury and the scream, the worse it was going to be.

Brock yelled after me, “What’s going on?” I called back, “He fell and hurt himself.”

I got into the room and my sobbing boy was still under the covers. He was crying so hard he wouldn’t let me pick him up. He wrung his hands and screamed over and over. I couldn’t see a welt or a knot and had no idea where he was hurt. He finally let me pick him up just as Brock came into the room. He immediately put his arms out for his dad, and then back for me again. In pain, he didn’t know what to do or what he wanted.

We walked downstairs talking calmly, trying to work him down. He, still crying, demanded to be put down and then became very upset when his feet hit the floor. I poured him a cup of milk and he drank it between gasps and sniffles. The worst of the storm was over… but we were all wide awake.

I turned on “Dispicable Me,” our new favorite movie, and we sat as a family on the couch. By 7am, we were all ready to go back to bed. As I went to bring Ronan back to his room, I finally noticed the welt… right between the eyes.

No wonder it hurt so badly.

My poor kid. It was an awful start to the day, and I hope he’s learned a little lesson. No more jumping in bed! Especially with a blanket over your head!

Anyway. Today we are headed up to Mooresville for Christmas with the family… so there may or may not be a Christmas Day post. As it is… Merry Christmas Eve!

Birthday Parties and I’m Sorries.

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I took two days off.  I don’t really know why… I have been so good about posting every day, it just didn’t come to me yesterday.  Or the day before.

Today, I’m watching the Biggest Loser.  I effin love this show.

So, I’m planning a birthday party for Ronan.  Only, sort of.  I’m totally unable to handle doing things like this.  I don’t want to have a bunch of people at my house, and I don’t want to try to make sure everyone has fun.  We have a ton of friends without kids that we want to come, and a ton of friends WITH kids that we want to come.  How do I make sure that everyone is having fun?  No one will know each other.

I know, I’m stressing over this for nothing.  It will just be fun, I know it.  It’s not a big deal.  I don’t know why I’m so anxious about it.  Same as everything else with this kid:  it seems a lot scarier when I’m thinking about it than when I’m actually doing it.

In other news, Ronan has the funniest poop squat ever.  He always goes to the dog crate to poop.  It’s hilarious.

Okay, so what else is going on?

Evidently, in my last post about sleep, some people that I care about very much felt like I was implying that they lie to me about their children sleeping.

First, I want to apologize.  It was never my intention to behave as though I think that everyone lies.  Nor was it my intent to act as though the fact that your children DO sleep through the night is something bad or that you should be ashamed of, regardless of how you got them there.

My point REALLY was that I used to lie to people about how Ronan sleeps.  I got so tired of hearing people telling me that I just need to let him cry, or that there must be something wrong with him because he doesn’t sleep, that when I was asked if he sleeps through the night, I would simply answer “Yes.”

I lied because it felt like I needed to.  I was tired of feeling like I was a failure as a parent because he didn’t sleep.  I don’t feel that way any more.  I don’t equate sleep with skill.  To me, they simply don’t connect.  Maybe that’s my way of protecting myself, but I really feel like every child is different.  And it’s okay that mine doesn’t sleep.

So.  I’m sorry.  I don’t hate you because your baby sleeps, and always has.  I don’t think any of YOU are lying to me about it.  But, hells yes I’m JEALOUS!  I know my time will come.  And I’m okay with how things are.

It’d be really nice if my next kid could sleep through the night.  I could really just love that.

Twitter.

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Yeah, I’m addicted to Twitter.  So what?

This was my Twitter feed last night.

  • Baby in bed at 9 sharp. Up at 11:15, and 11:30. Tried to hold him off. Bottle at 11:45, sleeping again.

Brock and I watched Zombieland, and then I went to bed.  I had my phone next to me, and this was how I kept track of how often Ronan woke up.

The funny thing is… I have found more support, sleep and otherwise, on Twitter than I’ve found anywhere else in real life.  What is it about Twitter that makes it so easy to make friends?  I push a follow button, you follow me back – BAM – instant buddies.

So many of us parents on Twitter have the same problems.  It’s easy to gravitate towards each other, to commiserate and support.  And it feels amazing to know that other people are out there going through the same thing, offering advice and judgement-free compassion.

Yeah, I haven’t been getting any sleep.  But it hasn’t seemed so bad.  I’ve watched a really amazing lady (@manhattanspeak) get her twins to sleep through the night in under a week WITHOUT crying it out!  I’ve watched as a father of triplets (@ryantrips) has seen major improvements in his childrens’ sleep, only to have all three of them come down with RSV, and be set back immensely.  I’ve watched the stolid acceptance of another father (@jgbreton) as he enjoys his time with his young son, instead of getting frustrated at his lack of sleeping.  I’ve had sweet help and suggestions with a few laughs from a wonderful mom (@dianasaurus).  And SO many more.

There are some awesome people out there.  I feel lucky to have met them.