TempestBeauty

Living. And loving. And hurting.

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June 17, 2007

What an interesting phenomenon.

I’d like to begin by saying that I intend to reply to every comment made on my earlier post.  I sat down yesterday with purpose, and strength, and drive.  I thought to myself that however many-hundred replies there were, that wasn’t too many to say something to each person. 

I was proven wrong after responding to less than ten, while my mailbox was filling up with notices of more comments.  I think it is a very honorable thing to wish to do – reply to everyone who could reply to me.  I then had to remember that each of those people that took the time to read what I had written, and then respond was just that:  one person.  One person to write one comment on one page.  And I am just one person, wishing to be able to write to many.  Wanting to express to each individual the thanks that I feel, and how their thoughtfulness has touched me, and that I appreciate them.  Eventually, I will get through all of them.  Likely, it will be long after I’m forgotten by the poster.  At least then they will know they were heard.

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Edit: 

I am coming across xangans who have their privacy settings changed such that I can’t see their profiles nor send them a message.  If you are one of those, I’m sorry I can’t give you a personal response, but thank you for yours!

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On another note.  Things change inside of your  mind when you know there is someone else out there reading.  I guess I have always written these posts with the idea of an audience in mind, but it was an imagined audience.  The actuality of it, the reality is a much different monster.  What if I offend you?  What if you decide I’m not who you thought I was?  How do I please everyone? 

But… I don’t write for you.  I write for me, and I write because I love to write.  I put my thoughts and emotions into words because sometimes it’s the only way for me to get them out.  Sometimes it’s the only way for me to figure out what I’m thinking.  Usually I don’t even know.  That is why I write, and that is why I will continue to write just the same.

And on another note all together!  Yes, my transmission died on me.  I drove it over to the transmission place on my lunch break with my fingers crossed that it was the “easy fix” again.  It was!  A “Speed Sensor” on the jeep went out, and doesn’t signal to the vehicle when it is time to shift gears, so… the car stops shifting.  Period.  Very scary when you experience it.  Since it had happened to me before, I didn’t panic, but it just happens to be a huge inconvenience.  I have to spend another night at the hotel in Monroe.  I have to bum rides from co-workers so I can get to and from work, and then to the shop tomorrow morning.

Things could be worse.  It could have been a 2,000 break down, and weeks to fix.  I’m happy.

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This here is a little bit about our life... our love... our pain... but mostly, our truth.

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